10 Steps to Help Introverts Manage Their Wedding Days

Maintain your social energy on the big day!

If you’re an introvert, you may be a bit anxious about your wedding day. This doesn’t mean you don’t want to get married; however, a ceremony and reception add up to an awfully long day of being the center of attention.

By Emily Lasnier

woman-holding-handwritten-paper-note-in-wedding-dress
Photo: Regina Hyman Photography

If you’re an introvert, you may be a bit anxious about your wedding day. This doesn’t mean you don’t want to get married, or even that you don’t want to have a big celebration; however, a ceremony, cocktail hour, and reception add up to an awfully long day of being the center of attention, and that can be exhausting to an introvert.

There’s a common misconception that those who are introverted must be shy or socially awkward, and thus advice for brides or grooms is often geared towards skipping the first dance or not reading personal vows. While, of course, there are introverts who are shy, it is not a guarantee. People who are introverted may still be active socially and have no problem with stage fright (many actors and comedians are introverts), but too much social activity can be emotionally draining.

blonde women with soft waves in white robe laughing while looking out window

Photo by Valorie Darling Photography

Keep yourself from becoming overwhelmed on what should be the happiest day of your life by taking the 10 preventative measures listed below:

- Get support. If your partner is an extrovert, ask if you can lean on them to do the bulk of the talking. They should presumably understand, given your close relationship.
- Have a preview. Take part in a “first look” to have a moment with your beloved before all eyes are on you at the ceremony.
- Limit your group. Have a smaller bridal party, so getting ready together doesn't feel so hectic.
- Consider a smaller guest list if you can. The fewer people there are to talk to, the less time you'll be pulled away.
- Create an energy surplus. Use the days preceding your wedding to soak up as much alone time as possible to essentially fill your reserves of energy.
- Maximize solitude. Spend the night before your wedding alone instead of having a slumber party at the hotel.
- Take a break. Sneak away from the reception for more photos – or even just some alone time – to give yourself a chance to recharge.
- Sit at a head table instead of sweetheart table. It may seem counterintuitive, as you'll be sitting with more people, but you'll also feel less like you're on display and you'll be among those whose relationships you truly value.
- Lean on the pros. Have a wedding planner or day-of coordinator to handle anything that goes wrong.
- Keep perspective. Remember that some guests will want to spend time reconnecting with each other, not just with you. You won’t have to personally entertain 150 people at once.

If you are shy, learn how to handle stage fright at your wedding here, and discover five bachelorette party ideas that go beyond bar hopping. 

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